I will not give my answer to the What Would You Do If - Wednesday question until late in the day - after everyone has had the opportunity to offer their ideas first.
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What would you do if ...
Your child informed you that a student in their class was constantly cheating and you knew this child and this child's parents.Would you ignore the situation and instruct your child to also ignore the situation?
Would you confront the child and suggest to the child that he tell his parents?
Would you go and tell the teacher?
Would you contact the parents and inform them that you have heard that their child is cheating in class?
What would you do?
Please offer your answer in the comments and please go over to my sidebar and participate in the poll on this topic.
This is what I would do:
This has never happened to me, but my kids have mentioned many times about kids cheating in their classes - it happens quite often.
If I knew the parents and the child - it would make it awkward. I would not confront my friend or the child - initially. I would suggest to my child that they approach the friend. I would recommend to my child that they should discourage their friend from this behavior and say that if it does not stop that then something will be said to the teacher or the child's parent. If the behavior did not stop - I would go to my friend.
Poll results: If a friend's child shared a class with your child and your child told you that the other child had been cheating in class - what would you do? 11 votes. 3 (27%) said they would ignore situation. 1 (9%) said they would confront the cheating child. 5 (45%) said they would tell the teacher. 2 (18%) said they would contact the child's parents.
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11 comments:
I think I'd confront the child and let them know that he/she needed to talk to his/her parents about what they were doing and reason for it. If they refused, I think I'd have to discuss it with his/her parents.
Okay, first of all, I would not confront the child myself. That would put my kid in a precarious situation. I would encourage my child to take any action necessary. I would suggest to Charlie Brown (my child) to go up to Lucy (cheater) and tell Lucy, "I have seen you cheating. You need to stop or you're going to get in trouble. It isn't honest and it's not fair to the rest of the class." If she does not respond, I would encourage Charlie Brown to approach her again, along with another student. If this still doesn't work, I would tell Charlie Brown to tell the teacher himself, or tell the principal. I would totally stay out of it. If I didn't see it, I can't get involved. Plus, this keeps the embarrassment to a minimum with the kid. Finally, this is the way Jesus suggests for people to handle conflict in Matthew 17. We go to a Christian school but I think this method is good no matter if you're Christian or not.
Head in the sand. I would think I should say something, but I would probably take the chicken exit and not say anything.
I wouldn't confront the child or the child's parents myself, since I wasn't actually there, and it might lead to an embarrassing situation that could get out of hand. I wouldn't tell the teacher because I didn't see it.
I would encourage my child to find a round-about way, or even an anonymous way, to put the ball into the teacher's court so she can watch and actually see it happening. Then the teacher could handle it, and that is as it should be.
First off, I'd never approach the kid myself about it. That's a really inappropriate way to approach the situation, because 1) you know the parents. you're undermining their roles and responsibilities. And 2) it's not fair on your child, nor is it fair on that child.
I wouldn't personally approach the teacher straight off either.
As a teacher, I know that there's nothing more annoying than a parent coming to me complaining about another child. I'm perfectly happy to hear serious matters. But more often than not, you get a LOT of bitching from people. You'd be shocked how horrible some parents can be about other people's kids. It really really s hocks me sometimes.
I htink I'd talk to my kid about it, and suggest that he/she goes to their teacher about it, in a mature way. i'd suggest that my child approaches the teacher and asks if they can talk privately/confidentially about something. I'd expect my child to have evidence to back up him/her claims, and I'd expect them to know that this isn't telling tales, that it's talking to a person of authority about a serious matter.
If the teacher didn't sort it out, or if it continued, I'd perhaps talk to the teacher myself, and say that I'd known about it, that I'd wanted my child to handle it, but that since the issue was continuing, I felt that I needed to say something.
The only way I'd every approach the parents of the child about it, was if the teacher refused to do something. It would depend on my relationship with those parents, and it's depend on the seriousness of the cheating. I'd possibly talk to the principal/deputy before the parents, if it was a really serious issue.
I would leave that situation up to the teacher to find out about and take care of. I would not see it as my place to interfere.
If I knew the parents well I'd say something to them, if I didn't I'd talk to the kid. I think if I ignored it, I'd be doing my own kid a disservice and teaching them something wrong.
the only way i would involve my self at all would be if the child were cheating off my child... in which case, i would give the teacher a call (not an angry call just a "heads up").
If it were my child's friend I would suggest my child say something. If he were not a friend I would mention it to the teacher casually. Just fyi, this is what my child has said.
I think I would alert the teacher to the fact that cheating was happening in his/her classroom. I wouldn't mention specifics. They should be able to figure it out from there.
I think I might ask the teacher if I could have a CONFIDENTIAL chat with her. I would tell her that my child has mentioned that he's seen some kids cheating in the class, and that she might want to address the whole class about this issue and develop some classroom policies against cheating. The child who is cheating might not understand how serious it is, or might be having a hard time understanding in class and is afraid of getting in trouble, or other things.
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