Tuesday, July 29, 2008

So ... Does This Mean We Don't Have To Have The Babies Anymore?

What do you think when you hear the stories on TV about the "Pregnant Man?"

You've heard about him - right? He was on Oprah - he's EVERYWHERE! And ... he's had the baby!

Please give me your honest opinion on this story. And then... later on today, I will tell you what I think.

I'm anxious to see if you have my similar point of view or if you are On The Flipside.

Please make sure you follow the comment rules when leaving a comment and be considerate in your opinions and nice to other commenters. And, please go over in the sidebar and answer the poll question on this subject.

Edited to insert my opinion on this subject (July 29, 2008 - 5:34 p.m.)

Okay ... So there were 27 people that took the poll and 24 (88%) say that this story "Makes Them Crazy", 2 (7%) people "Love This Story" and 1 (3%) "Have Never Heard Of This Man".

And ... now that I have some of your points of view ... I just want to say - most of us agree that ...


Every time I hear about this man - this ... woman that looks like a man - I want to scream!

Mostly, it's the way the media portrays this story - that MAKES ME CRAZY! How they keep referring to HIM as the ... "THE PREGNANT MAN". And ... there he is on TV and in magazines - looking very much like a MAN that is pregnant. And then ... there he is in People Magazine with the new baby.

I'm not okay with all of this.

There's nothing I can do about it, but ... it BUGS ME!

Every time I hear this story fixing to come on the news or on a talk show - I race around trying to find the remote to FLIP the channel. I can't stand to watch it!

I wish this couple well - I do. The baby is precious and I hope it continues to be healthy and I hope they all live happily every after - I DO! It just BUGS ME that they refer to him as "The Pregnant Man" and ... he is portraying himself as - a PREGNANT MAN!

Apparently, he's 1/2 man (on the outside) and 1/2 woman (obviously has a uterus). Maybe I'd be happier if they called him that. Maybe ... "The Pregnant Hermaphrodite".

I guess that just sounds weird (and disrespectful) and confusing.

I know it is probably not politically correct to say negative things about this man and his pregnancy - but - COME ON! S/He is obviously still a woman that looks like a man?

I understand that he was going through gender re-identification ---- taking drugs to change his appearance from female to male - but, he hadn't had any surgery to change his hoo-ha or his insides. Aside from his outwardly appearance (facial hair, lack of breasts, masculine features, etc.) - He is still a WOMAN that looks like a man - that was pregnant!

I think I heard that the woman in this couple was not able to conceive and since he hadn't had any surgeries yet to change his gender that he was still able to have children and so that is why he got pregnant. I get all that and I think that was their choice and I might very well have done the same thing if I had wanted a child so badly and this was the choice at hand. I am just VERY UNCOMFORTABLE with the images of his pregnancy and VERY UNCOMFORTABLE that it is all over the media.

It's NOT NORMAL! And ...unless we as a society strive for a sense of normalcy in our lives - in our world - there will only always be chaos and craziness. I don't want my kids growing up in a nation - in a world - that is chaotic and crazy. I want them to understand that there are things and people that are "outside the norm" and respect those things and people - be tolerant of all of it - I DO! I just don't want the "norm" to be skewed by bizarre stories like this, to the point that we see it on TV or in magazines and it becomes commonplace. It's not COMMON and it's not a MAN having a baby! It's a woman that looks like a man - having a baby and I don't think it is a story that needs to be plastered all over the place for my children to have to see and question. I can't hardly explain it and barely understand it - how will they? I'm not saying that this couple - this man - should stay hidden --- I just would like it to be reported (if it HAS to be reported) as it really is and not spun out of control.

I feel bad for this woman that was born with these gender identity issues. I have got to believe that there are some biological things that go wrong that cause some people to feel like they are trapped in the wrong gender body. I would not wish this sort of turmoil on anyone - it has got to be VERY HARD!

I also think that this couple has every right to have a child of their own and if S/He was able to become pregnant and have this baby - then that doesn't bother me. It's how S/He put himself out in the public and the media spun this story CRAZY!


Jacey said...

Ohhh... first comment.

To be 100% honest, I think it's a little.... weird.
I mean, I'm all for equality, and gay rights, and all that. I think that homosexuals have as much right to have children as hetrosexuals do.
But this whole choosing to be a different sex thing - that in it's self? I'm fine with it. But if you're going to make that decision, then it should be a 100% decision. Not a 'I'll be a man, but I'll have a baby' kind of decision. Because that's not how it's intended. Men don't have babies. (There's a reason for that..... :D) So if you choose to become a man? FIne. But you can't have it both ways.
There are plenty of ways this couple could have had children, without having to put their kid through the probable teasing etc that she'll get later on in life. How do you explain that to a child? How does a child accept that?
Hopefully, they're awesome parents, and it's NOT a big deal to the kid later in life.
But I still find it.... weird.

Gail said...

I say it doesn't count cause SHE is not really a man. She is a she, no if's ands or buts about it!

Now if a man who was born a man where to get pregnant... oh the possibilities ;) He He He

kim-d said...

I am right there with Gail. And also Jacey. The fact of the matter is, she/he/whatever wasn't born a man. Talk to me about it when a man who was born a man gets pregnant. Until that time, I don't think it counts. What I find baffling is why some people--any people--need so much attention. It's not enough that they're going to do a thing; they have to let EVERYONE know about it and possibly even try to get their 15 minutes of fame from it. Why? If, in your heart and soul, you want to do a thing, then just do it. You don't have to go on the talk show circuit with it. My opinion :).

angie said...

I hate this and it makes me crazy. She's a woman parading around as a man. Figures she/he would be in Oregon, too. :)

dani said...

kellan, i have never walked in the shoes of a person who is anything other than heterosexual. it is all VERY foreign to me.
i voted that it makes me crazy. but, more than that i just think it is a most awkward situation.
"awkward" in that if a woman feels like/desires to be a man, where does the desire to be a mother come into play???
to each his/her own, but i personally don't get it, and i'm not an uneducated person.
have a great tuesday:)

Toni said...

I am disgusted about this. I am. When this story was all over morning TV, I had to be sooooo careful because I didn't really want to have to explain how a boy was having a baby and that he used to be a girl, etc. I understand this but can my eight year old? And should she at this age? Not in my opinion. S/He is a freak and trying to hose big bucks out of the media for pics of the baby and I am sickened and outraged by this.

Just saying....

Debbie said...

God had a plan and there are people trying to mess with it...my Mom always told me and as I tell my son...what goes around, comes around. I just don't GET it.

Kaci said...

I agree with Gail, he was born a woman so it doesn't really count that the publicity he's getting is MAN having BABY...now if it said Gay Woman (who is the male in the relationship) having baby...looks like a dude but really a woman...blah blah...then would it get as much publicity? Noooo.

I think it's great that the family is having a child that they wanted so much...and will love! The world needs as much love as possible. So rock on to them. I wish them the best.

I'm very open minded always have been and I hope my daughter will be as open minded as well. :)

Brenda said...

Plain and simple, He, wasn't a man cause had he been a man, he would never have carried a baby and given birth.

There's too much messing around with Mother Nature and God these days and I'm afraid something bad's gonna come from it.

Megryansmom said...

Just a few words....Sodom and Gomorrah

Alison said...

Since he wasn't born with man "parts" he is not a man. Like others have said...men don't have babies. S/He is a woman. It is not news that this "man" had a baby. When a man (who is born a man) has a baby...then that might be newsworthy!

Sally said...

"He" has to be a "She" - whatever, it seems sad and wierd! And looking at the picture makes me a little ill.

Debbie said...

I love this blog already...

Please stop by, I have something for you!

Kel said...

Personally, I think the science of it is pretty simple, you can change how the world see us on the outside, but the inside we are still the same. He was a she and therefore was able to provide the means to concieve and give birth, however she will go back to being the dad afterward.

I often wonder what the child will think when they are old enough to understand? We as parents, don't always think about how this life we bring into the world will feel about it, how they will be treated...being a child is hard, growing up is hard without having to deal with this too.

Personally, I worry about the child.

Angela said...

Respectfully I agree with many of the other comments here in the sense that he's not genetically a man. So its not a man having a baby. Its a woman who bless their heart has chosen to live like a man. That's her choice. But all the publicity is annoying since its not a medical miracle.

rthling said...

I can't decide which part is worse. This person calling themself a man, and having a wife, then having a baby with the female body parts that came in the body, or the wife nursing the baby with artificial lactation stimulation.
One question.
Why couldn't the wife just have the baby?
The answer:
That wouldn't have been sensational.
This is not a medical miracle, Just someone doing what is right in their own eyes.
And there's not any way to express my opinion on the choices this couple has made without getting preach-y, so I'll just say this.

Queen of My Domain said...

This story just frustrates me to no end. I just don't agree with everyone saying it's a pregnant man. It's a pregnant woman living her life as a man. Until that final sex change is done then technically she is still a woman. Now as to whether I agree with her choices, that is another matter completely. But don't force me and the rest of the world to keep having to listen to stories about this being the first pregnant man. Because IMO, this is NOT the case.

Kami said...

I think I pretty much agree with everyone else...he is really a she, though you can't really tell since she has had hormones to change her appearance... what I do wonder about is the fact that she has had those hormones...how in the devil did she still get pregnant....what are the ramifications to the baby? Maybe none but it is something that concerns me.

It's all a bit strange but to each his own. The weird part is the attention they are getting :-)

I can't wait to hear your opinion!

THopgood said...

I think this person received a whole lot of attention, publicity, notoriety for being a female dressed like a man and being pregnant. I don't get it. "He" really IS a "she"....why all the attention?.....

Courtney said...

In my eyes he is not really a man. He still has all of his girly reproduction parts so it's not that amazing to me. It's not a miracle or anything. Just like IVF is not a miracle to me. Any baby born is miraculous what is so special about the fact that someone planted this embryo inside you and suddenly it's a miracle!?

Joanna said...

Irritating to say the least. It's just wrong on so many levels as everyone else has already said.

Cheryl said...

I couldn't even watch the coverage. Just reeks of WRONG!

Brittany said...

Ok, so I am a proclaimed "Bible Thumper." I believe the Word of God 100%. I am not going to judge these people, because that is not my place. Do I condone with what they did? No. But if they were apart of my family or my neighbors, would I still be there for them, love them and stand by them? Yes.

Therefore, I am saying that according to God, this isn't the most holy of things. But am I any more of a person than they are or any less of a "sinner," heck no.
I am sure I sin on a daily basis, so there is no way I would say "these people make me sick," or "I can't believe a transgender would even think of doing such a thing!"

I am sure this family is getting enough scrutiny and plenty of hate mail. Maybe they just need a little bit of guidance? Who knows. This baby is a gift, as are all children in this world, so I really do wish that baby a wonderful life, and I just hope that poor little child can live as normal of a life as possible.

AND... I hear "he" gave birth normally. SO... he must not be as much of a he as he says he is? Whoa. That was a lot of "he". hahaha.

Pregnantly Plump said...

I just don't think it's that newsworthy. She's not really a man, she kept those girl parts. I think the headlines should all read. "Man" has baby.
I'm not against her having a baby. I'm glad they were able to. I believe I read that her partner couldn't get pregnant, which is why she kept those parts. I just don't think it's newsworthy.

tammy said...

The whole thing is just weird. And sooo not news worthy.

One Scrappy Chicklet said...

Oh boy right off the bat I can see that I really have to be careful here.
I agree that he/she, whatever/whichever was born a women and therefore is not a man giving birth. I personally find it all a little stomach turning to be honest with you. Everyone has a right to live the way they feel they need to live and I hate to judge others but I am disgusted by people that say things like:this is what I was suppose to be, My gender at birth was a mistake. Well fine then if you were suppose to be a man be a man and where I come from: Men don't be birthing no babies. (said in my best Gone with the Wind voice)


Michelle said...

Ummm, I think it's wrong. My focus is on the child. Really... you want your child to be the focus of media for being the ONE child who has a daddy for a mommy? You think that's the best, most nurturing environment you can bring a child into? I find it selfish, and I really wonder about the ego of someone who needs to do that (AND needs to make a big deal of it... if it happened and he were silent on it, I'd be slightly more forgiving).

Julie said...

In my oponion, SHE isn't really a HE... Sure, SHE cut her boobs off and took some hormones to grow a beard... But left all HER girly parts there... SHE is still a SHE.

Men can't have babies!

Belle said...

How in the world do you have time for two blogs...I am so impressed.

Here's what I think. If a person has woman "parts" and has a baby then that person is a a woman. I don't care how the person dresses or lives...a man cannot have a baby. I'm not judging...I'm just saying...woman parts= woman.

Tabitha said...

I agree with the other comments, which said that he is really a she ~ as he still has womans bits to carry a baby etc!!
I am not sure what to think really ~ although I must admit that nothing suprises me nowadays ha ha !! XXXXXX

Kelli said...

I am not interested in this guy/woman. Because he is a woman who has changed parts of him to be a man so its really not a man, naturally having a baby.

Helen E.M. Wright said...

Yes, it's weird because we are not used to it.

Do I think it's wrong?!? No!! Do I understand it?!? No!!!

As long as the child is brought up in a caring and loving home they will be fine!

Truthfully I didn't pay that much attention to the story. I didn't find it that exciting. They pull you in with the 'Man pregnant' but once you find out that there was a sex change in there they lost my attention.

I am loving this side!!

Rosemary Bogdan said...

Kellan, I'm with you. Only women can have babies. This person had a baby. She's a woman. It's silly to call it anything else. I also just do not understand the gender change thing. There have always been women who were not particularly feminine and men who were not particularly masculine. That doesn't mean they are the wrong gender in the wrong body. Maybe they're just not very sexually charged. I don't think a person has to be sexual to be a whole and complete person deserving of dignity. The whole thing just seems very confused.

The Boyds Family said...

I never followed this story because I knew it was some kind of hoax. Now I see...S/He is not a HE.

Really, the only thing I have to say about this one is that I really feel for the child that was brought into this world under these sensationalized circumstances. Is 15 minutes of fame really worth the mental health of your children??

The Fritz Facts said...

I don't think the story creeps me out, just that the news keep shoving it down our throats, when it isn't the important thing at all in my mind.

I would rather hear about election issues, health care or the fires in CA than this, it doesn't touch me at all. I more or less tune it out now.

Sally said...

In my best Shania Twain:


Sorry, Kellan, had to do it!! It's late, but I've enjoyed reading all your commenters.

I think you're on to something with this here new blog!! :)

My Goodness said...

I'm with you...I don't need one more thing to explain to my kids. Thank goodness they are too young to care right now. But that just means that it will be way worse when they WILL care.

Anonymous said...

This honestly is very disturbing to me! I don't think it's natural and I personally, find it creepy.
I am ok with his choice to become a man but not to bore a baby.

Jaina said...

So, playing catch up I'm once again late to the party, but still want to put in my two cents. I honestly didn't hear of this person until I read your blog (I caught up quickly) But in this case, I very much agree with all that you've said. I think it would have been better handled OUT of the media. Which they very well could have done.

girlytwins said...

Disturbing. SHE is NOT a man. If SHE were a man SHE could not get pregnant. SHE is a woman. Whether or not she looks like one is not the point. SHE is NOT a man.

Darla said...

Bugged by it!!! I know I'm late but the other day when I "flipped" to this site (pun intended but respectfully so:) I scrolled down quickly to see what was on the agenda. Two of my young daughters happened to be seated near me and of course happened to glance at the screen as the picture of this pregnant person scrolled up. Right away I scrolled right back away from the pic as my skin crawled but my overly-observant daughter asked, "Wait! Was that a MAN that's pregnant?" First I answered, "Yeah.." then immediately, "No. It's a lady that wishes she was a man. She's still a woman and really truly always will be, no matter what she does to pretend she's not." One of them stated, "Well, she looks like a man!" I'm sure they were referring to the lack of breasts, so I said, "Well, she had doctors change her appearance so she looks more like a man." Then I said something that included a "he" and I was quickly corrected, "A 'she', you mean! You said, 'he'. She still is a woman, you know!"

Jason said...

Hi, Kellan. I've seen your name and your photo on a lot of blogs that I read and I thought I'd stop by and say hello, finally.

Your blog(s) look very interesting, and thoughtful.

I realize I'm in the minority here, but I thought I'd throw in my two cents worth:

The most important thing about these parents and this child is...will they be kind and loving to their child, provide a safe, secure environment, and a strong sense of self? Will they guide their child to be a contributing member of society? If so, then they're going to be fantastic parents regardless of their gender issues.

Are You Serious! said...

♥ I just figured out that you had other blogs...

Okay seriously HATE HATE HATE this story! It's not a "man"! If you have a uterous you're a woman! It's rather frustrating and like Angie says it just figures that he lives in Oregon and what worse is that it's in Bend and that's all of 15 minutes from where I grew up! Are you kidding me! errrr!

And then totally agree with Gail! Now if a man who was born a MAN got pregnant! I would be all over that story! :)