He was referring, at the time, to our two year old Pomeranian, Barbie.
When my husband made this comment about the pup finally being trained, I didn't even ask what he meant, as I assumed that he meant that she had gone easily into her crate. I simply said, "She's been trained. It's you that's not trained." He just laughed and crawled into bed.
He knew exactly what I meant when I made this comment. The puppy is pretty well trained, but she will not listen to a word he says, because I am the alpha dog in our family. She listens to most anything I tell her to do, because ... I am the alpha dog. My husband knows this as well. He doesn't necessarily like it or even know how it happened, but he knows.
I became truly aware that I was the alpha dog once we got Barbie. We also have another dog (a five year old Golden Retriever) named Buddy. I was the leader of the pack with Buddy before Barbie ever came along, but never exactly realized it until her arrival. Our family order goes: Me, Husband, Twins (equal on the totem pole), Little Billy, Alexis, Buddy, Barbie and then the two cats (Snape and Banana). At least that is the order the dogs relate to. And I think if my husband were to have to admit this honestly, he would agree that this is probably the order of things.
I didn't choose this alpha position. I don't think I was really even aware of what it meant until I started watching The Dog Whisperer (Cesar Millan), on TV. He's amazing - that guy- with those dogs. Anyway, I've watched him a lot over the past several years and agree with much of what he says on his show, with regard to dogs. And, one of the main emphasis' he makes - show after show- is that dogs see their family's as a pack and therefore need to have established or establish themselves, a leader. In our family, I was already the leader before these canines came along - so no need to change that, as far as I was concerned. They see me as the ... alpha dog.
My husband doesn't watch this show as often (if ever) as I, and probably doesn't even realize all this alpha stuff; therefore, he gets his ego hurt that these dogs won't listen to him. According to Cesar Millan, everyone (all humans) should be able to control these dogs - we should all be their leaders - as we are the humans. In my house, pretty much everyone is following me - especially the dogs.
My kids are always arguing about who's the boss. "You're not the boss of me," Alexis will tell her big brother. And then she will put her hands on her hips and turn her chin up in the air and announce, "Mom's the boss of everybody." I often tell my kids that their daddy is really the boss of everybody - just so they know.
Once, Alexis came to me and asked, "Are you in charge?" to which I said, "Yes." She then said, "Of everybody?" I said, "Well, I'm in charge of all you kids," and she smiled and walked away. I think she was trying to clear this concept up. I honestly think she may very well believe that I'm in charge of everybody - in the whole world. I didn't clarify that for her, as it didn't occur to me that she might think this until she left my room. That's okay - if she believes I'm in charge of everybody in the whole world - I kind of like her thinking I'm that powerful; like I have super powers or something. She's only seven ... she'll find out soon enough how very little power I actually have.
For the most part, the alpha dog position SUCKS! My husband's not missing anything.
This is JUST how it is in my house. What's it like in yours? Are you the alpha dog or are you On The Flipside and your husband holds the alpha position in your family?
Give me your honest opinion/answer - whether you agree with me or have a FLIPSIDE view. But, please make sure you follow the comment rules and be nice to me and other commenter's. And please go over to my sidebar and participate in the poll on this topic.